With Currikula you can upgrade your essay and get access to actionable feedback that you can implement to improve your final essay mark. We provide feedback on over 25 different points, from quote usage to excessive wording.
Furthermore, various naval inventions and advancements allowed the oceans to be sailed. Some of the most important are described as "the magnetic compass, the astrolabe, and the changes in shipbuilding". The compass invented by the Chinese gave a better sense of direction. The astrolabe, perfected in the Middle East, helped determine latitude. Large changes were also made to the European ships... The hulls of the caravels were bulkier and sturdier, allowing voyage in large waves. The southern triangle or lateen sail allowed ships to sail against the wind, which was not possible before. These inventions made sailing overseas an attainable task, leading to the discovery of various areas separate from Europe.
various' and 'various' are 'weasel' words and thus can be intentionally ambiguos and misleading.
'be sailed' may be an instance of the passive voice. Using the passive voice in essay writing is not advised. Consider changing to active voice.
"the magnetic compass, the astrolabe, and the changes in shipbuilding" is an unreferenced quote. This is a major concern as unreferenced quotes can be mistaken for plagiarism. Make sure to cite all of your work, both in-text and in your bibliography.
The Age of Exploration was a crucial period of time that made influential differences in not only the history of Europe, but the history of almost the entire world. This event would never have occurred without the Crusades, Renaissance, and advancements in technology... The will to fulfil religious desires, search for wealth, pursuit of personal fame, desire to explore and patriotic duty drove the Europeans out of the Old World in search of new places over the seas, seeking new opportunities and glory. All the voyages made helped link different countries together, and even influenced the basis of knowledge nowadays. Although the Age of Discovery ended in the 1600s, the effects of it still make significant changes to the world today.
This paragraph starts with 'The age of' which is the same as paragraph 8. You may want to chang this to avoid sounding repetitive.
'only' can weaken the intended meaning of the sentence. Look again and check for its necessity.
"The will to fulfil religious desires...seeking new opportunities and glory." This is a run-on sentence, it would be better to split it into two. This will help maintain good flow in your writing.
'nowadays' is a colloquialism and therefore should not be included in an academic essay. Using colloquial language can bring your grade down.
When we write we often use strong, weak or neutral tones. The words we choose to use affect how the argument or information we are presenting comes across. You can see our break down of how that paragraph comes across. If you're writing an argumentative essay, then you may want to come across a little stronger, whereas an explanatory essay may have higher levels of weak language. Generally, across the board, you would expect neutral to be the dominant tone.
Here we look at whether you are arguing for or against or praising or condemning the topic. For and against allows you to see whether the language reads positively or negatively. Praise and condemn tells you whether you seem to support or not the topic. For example, you may be arguing against a line of thought, with a counter argument but ultimately that is the side that you are going to choose. Therefore, the paragraph is against, but praising.
We give you these scores to present a generic view of complexity, abstraction, analysis and comparative language used in your paragraph. These scores can be used with graphs at the top of the page to show you how the flow of the language in your essay is going. If there are outliers of too much and no flow then this can indicate a problem with your communication.